You're at a place called Vertigo

If you have no reason to live, don't live.

2005-09-16T17:36:00.000-07:00

In an earlier post I wrote about how much I hate my family. Well, this is the sequel. I took my dad to court for his DUI charges, and he was informed that he should get an attorney, and the judge would allow a continuence, because if he's found guilty, kiss your liscence goodbye. He was so scared, and I almost felt sorry for him, but remembered, this weak man endangered peoples lives, more than once within two weeks, whatever he gets, he deserves and probably deserves more. On the way home, he pulled the pity plea, stating he probably wouldn't be alive for the next court date, October 10th. I asked why, he didn't have an answer, I no longer get upset about things like that, he is so full of shit, and he also told his brother, my uncle, that he had no reason to live. Well, correct me if I'm wrong, but having three kids is a pretty big reason to stay alive. I want to say, if you have no reason to live, end it. Why bother, don't stick around if all you're going to do is bitch and moan for pity.

Is this pathetic, this is a son talking about his father. I cant wait to have kids, just to do everything that my dad didn't do, and do things he did better. As if I don't have anything to worry about, like the stress of college and work. So many people have stress from that, but no one notices. How many people really know how shitty it can be to be a working college student. And my health, thats a joke. Pills I took a few years ago for my hyper thyroid condition, now make me sick. I have blood taken, it seems, once a week. I have an average of 4 doctors, and half the time, they don't even know whats going on. Now I'll need surgery, or some sort of radiation treatment for my thryoid condition. meanwhile, I feel like shit so much, why can't I feel fine, there are SO many idiots out there that don't know how good they have it, but, then again, there are many people worse than me, so, lets cheer for them too. :-d

I want a vacation. Not a weekend getaway, but a vacation, and not to a big city or tourist spot with lots of places to go and lots of things to do. I want a beach, a tropical paradise, where I can relax, feel good all the time, read and just, well, ENJOY MYSELF. Of course I want Heather there, that would be like half of me going if she didn't go. I want a waterfall, a sunset, a view. I want to look at someting beautiful without a tour-guide or a map telling me how it was made and when and by whom, I just wanna look, and enjoy and appreciate.. I don't want phones, papers, deadlines, or stress. I want to be cut off from the world. Not forever, just for a week or so. I'll come back, but I need to LEAVE first.

Put your mind in gear before you put your tounge in action

2005-09-02T23:56:00.000-07:00

Death is natural, as is life. A hurricane is a natural disaster. Just had to say that before I start ranting. Hurricane Katrina has cause national (and I'm sure international) news, from magazines and newspapers to TV. It is sad, and it does, for lack of a better term, suck. We have celebrities donating money, appearing on telethons, charity events, and cash donations. Nicolas Cage donated $1 million to his neighbors living in New Orleans. President Bush flew over the site, and that seemed, kind of presidential, but also gave speeches of "hope, and courage". These things seem to be expected.

None of them are wrong, I'm not saying that, people down there are dying, sick, and homless. What kills me is that there are MILLIONS of dying, sick, poverty stricken and homeless people all around America, and just because they didn't get hit my a hurricane or tsunami, no one notices, or cares. Why aren't there telethons or donations for everyday homeless or dying people? Why aren't there any articles, front pages, or TV spots about them? Bush might give a speech on them, but whether he takes any action is the key. Why doesn't Nicolas Cage, or any other over-paid m(b)illionaire celebrity donate money to every day shelters? Will it happen? NO Why not? Because it wont make headlines. Donating anything to the less fortunate is a great thing, but we're being biased? People being hit my a hurricane=headline news. Everyday homeless People=??? People hit my hurricane=Brave Souls. Everyday homeless people=Get a JOB you BUM!!! Notice the differecne?

Whether you're a hurricane victim, or an ex-employee before getting laid off so the people high up can save money, it' s not their fault. ALL of these people need help, but we're only willing to do it for some. We know why, we just need to know how to fix it.

Good old fun

2005-08-01T01:42:00.000-07:00

Who knew that you could hate your family and friends so much. Lets start with Mike. He was one of four best friends as of one year ago. We we're a great match as friends. He dated Suanna, problem, it fucked him up. He's the kinda guy who always needs a girlfriend and falls in love with all of them. They broke up, and he hasn't been the same. About 3 weeks ago he got mad at me cause I saw him too much and suffered overexposure. We had a hugh fight, and some of the words cut as deep as lightsabers. Heather and Kati convinced us to make up, so we did and I lent him Half-Blood Prince to read.

He let me down, after going and spreading shit with friends, and saying he doesnt want anything to do with us. So I sent him a long message with things I'd never thought I'd say to any of my friends. Ouch...oh well. I hope to never see him again. Out of 4 last year, I lost Seth when Hether and I got together. Heather is now my girlfriend, and I don't consider that in my "best-friend" category. Mike is an idiot. Kati is the lone one left. I can count only on Kati and Heather.

I hate my family now moreso than ever. My pity-loving sister (who inherits that from my dad) moved out due to the stress over here. Mom, Heather, and I live here. Heather and I are often out at work, or playing, whatever. Her and moms relationship has been steady, and not hectic. She moved in with our brother, Nolan, his wife Linda, their two sons 7 and 10, and their new 7 month old daughter. Nolan and Linda clash a lot, she's a little crazy and he's a little stupid. She expects too much of him, and he doesn't do enough. It seems that she'd be more stressed over there, now she says herself she's a built-in babysitter and cook, funny huh?

Dad quit smoking pot, but continues to smoke and pop pills such as Valium, Zanex, etc. About two months ago he totaled his car when he fell asleep under the valium. He was charged with a DUI. Last week he did the same thing, only with the work truck, but told the cops he swerved out of the way of a dog, and they didnt find the pills, and didn't charge him, pity. He deserves some sort of jail sentance in my opinion, if he was drunk, or high on pot or something else, he would have been.

Mom is crazy and naive, Harry, good old stepdad, is a general pshycho. These people are trying to raise me, and are so childish that they don't even need a fight anymore for one of them to sleep on the couch. He's an uncompassionate, unfeeling moron. He shows no emotion, other than anger. It never gets violent, thank god, or one of both of them might be dead...from me. Their arguments span from porch lights to carpet to our pets.

A few things that make me happy are Heather, I love her, Kati, well, I love her too, baseball, I love that too, and can't wait for school to start, just to have something productive to do. I'm in the middle of the Da Vinci Code, and plan on reading as much as I can, dive myself into other people's lives...yea that sounds nice.

The Half-Blood Prince

2005-07-18T20:38:00.000-07:00

I quoted one of my friends that it would take me 1 week to 10 days to finish book 6, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince. I fooled myself, finishing it only 2 days. Thats nothing, Kati read it in two days despite having to work both of them for 8 hours each, and Jessie, Kati's super-human sister, read it in 5 hours. (Holy Shit) For those who like Harry Potter, this one ranked up in my top two. My favorites of the books are as follows.

#1: Goblet of Fire #2: The Half-Blood Prince #3: Prisoner of Azkaban #4: Order of the Phoenix #5: The Scorcer's Stone and #6: The Chamber of Secrets.

I don't know how to put it in words, or if I can, there's something about this book, something more dark, more powerful. It by far has the best beginning, as they all tend to start of slow, this one did not. The ending however, was odd. It was gut-wrenchingly sad, and somewhat happy and satisfying. The romance aspect of this book also was bigger and better than the other books. I think whats most important is that in the end, it didn't wrap up like the other books did, but like a cliffhanger, left you wanting more, wanting it NOW!!! So, join me in started the 3 year countdown for the final, and possibly best one yet, Book 7.

In other news, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory was great, from the acting to the ammusments, it was all around great. Solid 8 out of 10. For those who are stupid, illiterate and ignorant calling it a re-make, go read the book, see this one and watch the version with Gene Wilder, and then talk to me, and for that matter, fuck all you indie and emo fucks t00!!!! OK, thats all, love ya , bye.

Baked Snack Crackers?

2005-07-10T15:25:00.000-07:00

Well folks, its been weird. Mike is no longer my friend, which sucks cause after Seth left, (refer to my earlier posts), Mike was the man. He was my best friend, and when he was Mike it was great, but there were times when he was moody, and pissy, and it was usually hit or miss with him. I have to admit there were several things about him that pissed me off during our friendship, but nothing worth talking to him about. Such examples are when I lent him $5.00 to reserve Star Wars Trilogy on DVD, which he never bought. I ened up buying it for him for X-Mas, and, there was no thank you or apprecitation, although I'm pretty sure he did apprecitate it. I am currently out of work. I quit my job of 2 years in May, and got another one at Wal*Mart in late June. I quit that too, I hated it. Mike has been out of a job for close to 6 months, which means he complains when we have nothing to do, cause he and we usually dont have money, and when there are things I want to do with Heather and Kati, and he can't afford it, I ened up paying for him. It was no big deal for a while, cause we all enjoyed his company untill recently when he was "hit or miss". So it went down 2 weeks ago and also involved Kati, but we're doing just fine now. We had a huge argument online, and it wasn't pretty, some of the words cut as deep as lightsabers. I don't think I'll be talking to him anytime soon, or, ever again for that matter. What really pisses me of is that Seth, Mike and I had so much fun for so long, it was perfect. He was ok with us for a weekend doing nothing much, hanging out and playing games, but, not anymore. So, join me in telling Sally Bear good riddance. Heather and I are doing good, but we will not be attended our previously planed vacation to Florida, she has to work. Its no big deal, we were discussing not going even before that. Get ready for Book 6!!!! We don't have that much longer, under a week.... well, fine, thats all, jeez, didn't mean to ramble that long, sorry, god...*sighs heavily. Sometimes you wanna go where everyone knows your name, sometimes you wanna go to Bangkok. I apologize for any grammatical errors in here, I'm too lazy to go back and proff reed. In response to my lone comment last post, my tattoo is of Obi-Wan and Anakin dueling with lava backgrond on my right shoulder blade. :-d

May cause drowsiness or dizziness

2005-06-24T23:16:00.000-07:00

Joker Here, welcome. Its been a while, and, well, hey..I've been busy, lazy, sick, etc. I had my birthday, June 16 and had a good one. I completed my U2 CD collection, and added one DVD, including my first, and only, tattoo, St. Louis Cardinals shirt, and lotsa money. I got my car back from major complications, and was pissed for the total. Anywho, after the recent quitting of my job, I got a new job at Wal*Mart, kill me now. What really sucks is I've been sick and missed a few days now, and, well, being sick sucks. Thats all for now, please reply with your comments, arguments, and compliments. Dont ever forget, Im not a snob, I'm just better than you! J/K LOL OMG LMAO LMFAO TTUL TTYL (Im making fun of idiots) so Long, Morgan Creek

Stoli

2005-05-30T06:50:00.000-07:00

Well hello to those who have somehow wandered to my post. I'm currently listening to U2, and drinking a Dr Pepper. I'm happy to say that things are going good. Over the last two months my life has changed drastically, for the better of course. My best friend, Heather and I confronted feelings for eachother, its only that she was dating my other best friend for going on 3 years. This was a problem. She made her decision, and he didn't take it well. He no longer talkes to me, only her. Anywho, things are going good for us, we're living together, and no were not moving too fast, and I get satisfied every night. She has a bigger bed.

I have a small burn on my arm, and it hurts.

As you all may or may not know, May 19 was the opening of Revenge of the Sith, and well, IT ROCKED. Since then, I've seen it 4 times, including opening midnight showing. You can call me a geek, and I'll agree with you, but its so much fun. I have a lot of star wars games, including star wars chess, monopoly, and trivial pursuit.

I saw U2 in Chicago, which was a lot of fun. Never seen U2, never been to Chicago, so I had a great time. I took my one and only (see first paragraph) and had a blast, but spent a lot of money, perhaps too much. We saw the Navy Pier, Sears Tower, Lake Michigan, the train station twice. The concert was the highlight, they put on one hell of a show. If you dont know of U2, try www.u2.com or www.youreanidiot.com

Thats all for my first post. Enjoy it, dislike it, or eat it for breakfast.